My Rosh Hashanah Prayer

Every year I start the High Holidays in bewilderment. My question is always the same: Will I have a breakthrough? Will I “get it,” delve inside myself deeply enough to know my failings that I’ve overlooked? Will I find a way to better my acts in the coming year?

Through the days of prayer and reflection, I keep returning to these questions. I am always anguished at my inabilities to see. I stand and cover my eyes, and beg myself to see what must be before me. I get mentally frantic at times. I lose hope. I pray for hope for myself. I ask G-d to help me to find the strength within myself to open my eyes.

Somehow, every year I experience a miracle. Just before the end of Yom Kippur services, a revelation – as clear and succinct as can be – enters my consciousness. It’s different every year. It’s never what I thought it would be as I searched.

It carries me through the coming year, and as I wander I’m thankful for the light provided by this insight. I’m convinced that I wouldn’t make it through the year without that light of understanding, and obedience to that commitment to better acts.

As we enter Rosh Hashanah, I wish to all to find their light for the coming year.

May you be inscribed in the Book of Life.